10 Things I Learned/Realized in Middle School

So I recently graduated middle school, which is actually really sad because I LOVED my middle school, especially in 8th grade. However, it took me a while to get to that point. I learned a lot these past two years and there have definitely been some ups and some downs in the process, but I thought what better than to share my new knowledge with the world (or a very, VERY small portion of the world). Here are 10 things I learned or realized(lessons, acceptance, etcetera) in middle school.

1) Awareness

I mean this in multiple aspects. I learned self-awareness: being aware of my flaws and strengths and being aware of what I am saying or how I come across to other people. This one is actually a sore subject because of HOW I learned this- let's just say I made a mistake and hurt a friend and I will never make that mistake again. I also learned the importance of being politically aware and just aware in general of world events and progress. Because of America's current political landscape and the tension between everyone, I've been exposed to a lot of politically charged agendas in the past two years. I'm not saying I'm an expert, or even that I could declare myself in a specific political party, but I am saying that I've learned a lot and in this time and age, it's more important than ever for teens to be aware and informed about what's going on in the world. I've been reading more articles, keeping an eye on the news, and immersing myself in different viewpoints, POVs, and perceptions and it's had a good impact on me.

2) Self love

Like 90% of people who've gone through middle school, I was (and still am) quite insecure and self-conscious. Part of it is the media, part of it is societal expectations and body standards, and a lot of it is a false image projected by our minds to put ourselves down, but whatever it is, it sucks. However, these past two years I've grown to accept and even love my body, my face, and my personality. Instead of denying compliments, I accept them and accept the fact that they are genuine and possibly even correct. When I look in the mirror, I don't hate what I see. I've tried to accept every aspect of myself and though I haven't completely succeeded- I've made progress. It's hard, trust me it's really hard, and I still struggle but most of all I've tried to understand that this body, this mind, this soul is one given to me- the only one I've got and it's done a lot for me so I should love it. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with cutting your hair or wearing makeup or even exercising to gain muscle or anything like that to "change" yourself and those things can even be great, but all of these things are surface level- your body is still the same one you've been given. So try to love it.

3) Friends are amazing

This seems self-explanatory, but really, truly, friends are so important. It doesn't matter how many you have, but it does matter the quality of friends you have. In 7th grade, I was more focused on myself above all and that wasn't a bad thing especially because I was deeply struggling with mental health last year and was trying to balance so many things, but in 8th grade I took the time to appreciate the friends I have, the new friends I've made, and the friendships I've strengthened. It was honestly an awakening to realize I am not alone in my struggling and that I have people who will listen if I wanted to talk about it or just rant about life.

4) Anxiety Sucks

Middle School was pretty much the awakening of my anxiety and even some minor depression for me. This is not uncommon in American teens unfortunately and it's something that many people go through. Despite that, it's still a topic that is so stigmatized and not talked about a lot. So many people are struggling through mental health issues and have no idea how to deal with it since very few are even aware or educated on the topic. I thankfully found help in my mom and also the internet, specifically through the experiences of other people going through the same thing (articles, books, etcetera). My anxiety was really bad last year in the Spring (dark, dark times) and though things have been pretty good for a while, there are still some bad days where I feel weightless and like I'm spiraling down farther and farther away from everyone and everything else... But I've sort of accepted that it's a problem and now I'm learning how to make it less of a problem so that's something I learned: it's okay, it's normal, it can be fixed slowly and painfully but it can be. Also: you're not alone in this.

5) Liking people doesn't have to be this intense.

This is more of a stereotypical middle school girl problem (it's still a problem for boys but not stereotypically). Let's just say I had a rough experience liking a boy in 7th grade *shudder* and it taught me a lot. First, that there's a type of guy you should not get attached to without sound reason and second, liking someone isn't the end of the world. This may seem self-explanatory but I'm someone who takes things way too seriously. Now I can just ignore it.

6) Teachers (the good ones at least) understand/or Teachers are amazing too

I came to middle school with the pre-imprinted knowledge that teachers didn't and wouldn't care about you because they have so many students or they just don't care. While it's true to an extent that you cannot rely on teachers as much in middle school, they aren't robots- they're human beings and they understand when things get too much. I'm grateful to the experience I had with teachers at my school because I know a lot of students aren't that lucky and I'm glad that they showed me that it's okay to confide or talk to teachers when you're struggling or if you have a question.

7) I can't do everything and I shouldn't overwork myself.

Part of the reason I was so stressed these two years was because I tried to do too many things at once, which was more than I could handle. I'm a perfectionist and am really ambitious. I want to do so many things but something I've had to accept is that I CAN'T do everything I want to do. I have to prioritize the more important things first like school and my mental health/stability. This is also the reason I have decided to quit one of my longtime activities: speech and debate. I don't know if this is for good but it does take up a LOT of time and I've been having frustrations with it for a while now. High school debate is also a lot different from middle school parliamentary debate so I'm not too sad about it. I may return to it in 10th grade, we'll see.

8) Everything doesn't have to be perfect.

This one is still one I have trouble remembering at times since I'm a huge perfectionist. However, when life gets busy and there's less time to do everything, you have to sacrifice the unnecessary details and just do what's needed, nothing more. I've mostly begun to do that with projects. I always used to put so much effort into them and while that's not a bad thing, it really stressed me out so I've accepted that doing what's required is sometimes all that's needed.

10) Treasure the good times before it ends :(

This one is kind of sad and depressing but it's something I did learn... quite painfully. I started off this past school year, really sad and empty because a lot of the friends I had made the year before were gone off to high school and everything else had changed: teachers, classmates, curriculum, etcetera. I cried a lot back then because I missed last year and I realized that I never really treasured those good times before they were gone. I missed so many opportunities because I was naive and stupid or insecure and scared and I regretted it so bad in the end. So I vowed that I would appreciate this year as much as I could before it was all over because leaving 8th grade and leaving behind this school and these teachers and all my friends was going to be 10 times more painful than I ever thought. And I did- treasure the moments I mean, but that doesn't mean it hurt any less. It still hurts, but it's sort of the way of life right now. People leave and people come. School ends and you have to keep going on. That was really depressing, I apologize.

On that really *happy* note, those were the ten most important lessons I learned/things I've accepted in my journey though the crazy ride that is middle school. It's been insane- there have been a lot of highs and a lot of really low lows. I've cried and laughed and screamed and rejoiced. I've felt happy, content, proud, eager, enthusiastic, safe, loved, nervous, terrified, overwhelmed, stressed, depressed, frustrated, angry, confused, insecure, useless, lonely, exhausted beyond anything I've ever felt before, and really really lost but it was a fun time above all (not always fun, but you know- fun).

So there you have it. Hopefully this either comforted you or made you relive painful memories of your past *awkward laugh*, but seriously if it's the second, just remember... it's all over now so look on the bright side. If it's not over for you yet, don't be afraid (well not TOO afraid) and take a deep breath because life goes on and pretty soon the dark days will be vague memories. Focus on the good times and appreciate what you have before it's gone. This became a lot more preachy than I intended so I better wrap it up here. I hope you have a lovely day.

No mourners, no funerals,

-SureenaWrites